One of my closest friends went to be with Jesus last week. She was only 29-years-old, and it was a sudden and unexpected death. She was married to Ben, they had a 16-month-old son, Judah, and a baby on the way. I had the privilege of speaking on behalf of her friends at the funeral a few days ago. I was nervous for many reasons, but especially because I wanted so badly to honor her well. Through God’s grace and strength, I know that I did. Below is what I said. If you knew her, I hope that it blesses you. If you didn’t know her, I hope that it compels you to put your trust in Jesus and get busy loving others like Kam did.

How do you describe the life of someone as incredible as Kambly Belz in just a few minutes? It’s impossible, but I will do my best.

I met Kambly when she was a sophomore at Westwood High School. I was a fresh UT graduate working for Young Life, I met her and some of her friends, and I started spending time with them in a mentor type role. But Kam was every mentor’s dream. I remember distinctly when she was only about 16 and I was the ripe old age of 23, us going to Starbucks, her getting her go-to Chia, sitting down and her asking ME about MY life.

Whoa, whoa, whoa, that’s not how this is supposed to go…I’M mentoring YOU. I should have known then that Kam was different, but it took me a while to catch on. I would care for her, listen to her, talk with her about her relationship with Jesus, her high school struggles, and sure enough, she would almost always ask me about my life. It would startle me every single time. I can’t emphasize enough how uncommon this was when working with high school kids. Most of the girls I was mentoring didn’t even bother to ask my last name. Most of them didn’t have a faith, and that’s why I was spending time with them. But, Kam not only KNEW Jesus, she LOVED Jesus. And that’s why even at 16, she knew it wasn’t all about her. She saw others, and she saw me.

I can stand here today and say that even though I received the “Young Life leader” title, the “mentor” title, Kam was my Young Life leader too. She loved me so well. As she moved into college and then adulthood, our age difference became irrelevant. We became friends. The best of friends.

And now I get the honor and privilege to tell you what I loved about her the most…

Let’s start with the obvious…

Kambly was beautiful. She was absolutely stunning. People often thought we looked so much alike that they would ask us if we were sisters. Sometimes we would say yes. I loved this because I always wanted a sister and also, who doesn’t want to be told they look like someone as beautiful as Kambly. Kambly was absolutely beautiful.

Kambly was Transparent. Kambly was unashamed in her authenticity. And, in the most graceful way, she would invite you into vulnerability by being vulnerable.  She bravely shared her struggles and fears with others with the hope that someone would relate and not feel alone. Anytime she faced a small or large hardship, I could see the spiritual fruit blossoming in every part of her life. She truly believed Romans 8:28, that “God works all things for the good of those who love him” and she was going to be an open and willing vessel for God to create good from any and every situation in her life. Kambly was Transparent.

Kambly was a Romantic…Even when I spent time with Kambly in high school, she always loved LOVE. But, it wasn’t just normal boy-crazy teenage girl stuff. She had a heart that believed in love. One of those hearts that can only come from a loving mom and a loving dad who also loved each other. She had an innocence about her that I hope my daughter will have her whole life. And she never found the love she was looking for until Ben. She was so head over heels in love with you, Ben. From the very beginning to the end and every day in between. She truly believed all her dreams had come true. And she loved Ben with her feelings, deep passionate love. But, she also loved Ben sacrificially with her mind and actions. I can’t tell you how many conversations we had where she was just trying to figure out how to be the best wife possible to Ben. Pushing herself to turn those deep loving feelings into real flesh and blood actions that he could feel every day.

I gave her a hard time pretty regularly because she would post these long Instagram captions declaring her love for Ben. I would say, “Kambly, you have to stop doing that. You’re making us all nauseated. We get it, you love Ben. He’s your lifelong boyfriend.” And she would laugh and say, “But, that’s how I really feel!” And that’s the thing about Kam. That was how she really felt. It wasn’t for show. Those posts weren’t for anyone else. If she loved you, she wanted the world to know it. And no one was more precious to her than Ben.

But, a very close second was Judah. She loved Judah with every fiber of her being. I might be biased, but there has never been a better mom than Kambly Belz. And Ben, I promise you that myself and the people in this room will make sure Judah knows how amazing his mom was and how much she loved him. He will know that.

Kambly was Joyful.Kambly was just FUN. If I wanted to go on an adventure or do something stupid, Kambly was the one I wanted to call. She was always up for anything. When I think of her, I think of her smiling. She lived life to the full. She believed that God made life to be fun and our job was to soak up every bit. She probably took advantage and lived more life in her 29 years than most people experience in an 80-year-long life.

You couldn’t help but feel lighthearted and more playful around her. But, then she also had this ninja ability to go from fun and light hearted to talking about real things and then back to being light hearted. It’s what made her so easy to be around. She was fun, but she didn’t believe that fun couldn’t mingle with the reality of life. It all flowed together for Kam. Kambly was Joyful.

Kambly was Empathetic. Romans 12:15 says that we should “Rejoice with those who rejoice; weep with those who weep.” Kambly was an absolute master at this. She was IN IT WITH YOU. If you had something to celebrate, she would celebrate as if it had happened to her. If you were crying, she was ready to get out the tissues. She never hesitated to be with you in the hard times, and she always seemed to know what to say. I remember so vividly when I got pregnant with my first daughter Nora, and Kambly and Ben had been having trouble getting pregnant, and had even suffered through a miscarriage. I was nervous to tell Kam I was pregnant. But, she did not bat an eye and rejoiced with me in it. Kambly was Empathetic.

Kambly was Faithful.She was faithful to her friends. Kambly knew how to show up. It’s hard to maintain life-long friendships, but Kambly did it by pursuing us relentlessly with her love…and her questions. She loved to ask a good purposeful question. I would tell her a story about something in my life and she had 15 follow up questions – most of which I had done zero self-reflection on until that moment.

She was also faithful to her family. She loved her Dad. She loved her Mom. She loved her brothers all deeply and uniquely. I knew so much about her family even though I didn’t know them well, because she talked about them constantly. How I could be praying for them, what she enjoyed about each of them, how she was thinking about helping in a given situation. She would have done anything for each of you.

She was also faithful to her God. Kambly faced many hardships for a woman her age. Particularly in her father’s illness and death, I saw Kam fight for her faith. And she wasn’t just fighting for her faith, she was taking all of us with her. She wanted everyone to know that no matter what, God is who he says he is – good and powerful. And when she wrestled, she did it in a way that inspired everyone around her. She didn’t try to hide her struggle or her doubts. She stared them straight in the face. She was a warrior. And I would have followed her into any battle. Kambly was Faithful.

I have a hundred more characteristics I could share, but if I could pick one word to describe who Kambly was, it would be: CHILDLIKE.

In Matthew 18, Jesus says:

“Truly I tell you, unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven. ⁴ Therefore, whoever takes the lowly position of this child is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven.”

You know when you look at a child who’s about 4 years old and you look at their optimism, and their joy in the smallest things, and their faith to trust their parents, and their extravagant expressions of love, and their sweet vulnerability, and you think,

I wish I could be more like THAT?

Kambly was just. Like. That.

She knew how to live the life Jesus was calling us to when he said to become like little children.

I’ll end with this:

Billy Graham once said,

“Someday you will read or hear that Billy Graham is dead. Don’t you believe a word of it. I shall be more alive than I am now. I will just have changed my address. I will have gone into the presence of God.”

Today we have heard that Kambly is dead.

But, don’t you believe a word of it.

She is more alive than she was last week.

She’s just changed her address.

She’s in the presence of God and…

She has never been more beautiful because she has been made perfect.

She has never been more transparent because she sees clearly how God sees her.

She has never been more joyful because every tear has been wiped away and her joy has been made complete.

She has never been more empathetic for the sorrow we are experiencing here, but she also receives it with joy because she can see the full picture, the full story of all our lives and what God is doing.

And she has never been more faithful because her faith has become sight.

So, don’t you believe a word of it. If she were here, she would say the same.

*If you would like to give to the Belz family, you can do so here: https://www.gofundme.com/in-loving-memory-of-kambly-belz

**Edit on 2/2/19: Some have been asking how it happened…The short version is that she passed out at home and never woke back up. The doctors don’t have answers for us yet, but we’ll know more in a few weeks. Kambly was an open book always, so I know she wouldn’t mind me sharing. Thank you for your prayers.